Alrighty then! (this probably should be followed by Jim Carrey’s face in Ace Ventura – The Pet detective XD)
So it has been 14 days since my last post… WOW!
You know they never tell you that writing a blog isn’t as easy as it sounds or looks!
In fact it is seriously hard! I mean People!!! What on earth?!
Customize this, widget that, HTML the proverbial C***P out of it! I even got a book…. “How to Blog Made Easy” by Richard N. Williams – I’m sure it’s very helpful when you have the time to read a lot of what looks like CSS code upside down in Arabic…. especially when you have a busy schedule!… That is of course right next to my “Idiots Guide to Organizing your Life” by Cindy Aldred – who, I swear to God, is like Martha Stewart on Speed and Duracell in the world of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder from Hell!
I mean don’t get me wrong! I have OCD!! But… this woman is taking it on to the next level and telling us, the busy moms, and business people that we can do this picture perfect crap ourselves and without professional help. Well WE CAN’T! We need a shrink to make sense of the mess in our brain so we can use it to function in a world filled with human beings that actually live in a de-cluttered but, still somewhat full of stuff, home that they actually love! Whereas I just HATE mine!
I’ve to pick up after mostly all even though my legs barely work. Especially after a full nights work! I mean that’s insane! Never mind laundry that has been piling up on top of the washer (all belonging to me btw) and the bags and bags of proverbial crap that i have to go through and throw out because i probably don’t even need the half of it!
I don’t wanna look like Morticia Adams in the middle of Summer in Black nor do I purposely require the stench of the sweat that will be pouring off of me in said instance! I’m not even getting into taking out summer stuff to switch with winter crap, that is all over my wardrobe! and guess what?! I have 16 items in said wardrobe that I actually wear too! SO like any good diligent student i read the “Idiots guide” and quite frankly realized, I’m not the idiot, about 3 pages in… she’s the idiot if she thinks that i have time or resources to devote purely to organise the place when: “forgive me dear Cyndy…” you have a screw, in that OCD brain of yours, missing somewhere – however if you do run a “home tidy-up services” and building the wonderful things you have in that book – be my guest I’ll pay you!!!
Then came stereotypical Mills & Boon Novels – Both Sexy, amazing, intriguing and just mouthwatering delicious to read! Word of warning for younger crowd – Judy Devereux is who you want to read as your introduction to dirty books. And if you try it in real life. ..DON’T, it never works out the way you think it will!
And the best after that was, because anyone reading Mills & Boon Novels will concur, the brains turns to mush. So you need some sharpening of said minf so whip out none other than……..drummmrollll please! “The Aptitude Test workbooks” with over 400 puzzles and all by a really fucked up genius Saint Jim Barrett, god bless you my friend!
Following which, I then pick up a decent really cool and funny and, most amazing book that is out of this planet, was actually helpful and made me happy!
I introduce to you the one and only Rachel Hoffman! and”Unf*uck Your Habitat” “You’re Better Than Your Mess.” Funny and ludicrously hilarious! The one book that is guaranteed to change your life and if not…. At least entertain you for a long while 😉